Reddit.girls You Know in Real Life

Let's face it: Not anybody ends up with a partner who truly feels similar "the ane." In fact, many people settle for someone who simply treats them well, even if the love they share is underwhelming — or absent entirely. And now, people who feel like their partner isn't "the one" are sharing their stories in a viral thread.

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It all started when Reddit user u/violetshug posed a question to the internet: "Women who settled for someone who you knew wasn't the one, merely was otherwise a good person, how is it going?"

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Here are some of the acme-voted responses from users:

one. "Information technology'south sad and deadening, but safe. I do miss 'the one' sometimes, but we're simply friends and we could never be more that. It'due south either this or total solitude, so at least I accept companionship, sex, and someone who truly loves me. Of form I would requite my correct arm to have my truthful beloved, but here we are."

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2. "Married for five years, together for 16 years. It isn't always easy. Nosotros're in a rough spot and it's easy after every result to think, 'I knew I never should have stayed with him.' Sometimes I wonder if I'm existence a coward... My hubby adores me and is a good man but does not fulfill me intellectually, is emotionally young, and we are on unlike planets of sexual desire. It's a struggle but it's not a nightmare."

—HeathrBee

3. "My married man now is good. He'south a fine person, a strong provider, he makes me laugh, the sex is satisfying. Nosotros can talk to each other easily. It's merely non the 'IN Love' experience that everyone says they want. Don't get me wrong: At that place is love. But the romance/Prince Mannerly/ride-or-die matter is not there. I'thou in this for the long haul. So is my hubby."

—Babaloo_Monkey

iv. "It's going fairly well — ups and downs for vi years now. He works long hours and I love spending fourth dimension on my own! Information technology's harder when nosotros have his kids, as I take no desire to be a mother, but I'grand better at organizing than him, and so I take on a child minder role anyway. Hoping for the earth to open up upwards soon, equally one of the things we savour is a romantic getaway. I love him, but I'm not in beloved with him."

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5. "Information technology's going decently well. We have some communication bug to work on (equally well every bit emotional maturity on my partner's side), just otherwise information technology's functional and I'chiliad mostly happy."

—GoddessofPlants

6. "I was convinced 'the i' was going to give me collywobbles and be overwhelmed by my presence. When I met my current partner, none of those things were true. I kept questioning it, being like, 'Something's wrong. I don't know if he's the one.' We've been together for a while and I'm glad I didn't listen to those shreds of doubt. Butterflies are overrated. My partner shows upwards for me every twenty-four hour period, and we have congenital a actually potent and solid foundation."

—killerwheelie

vii. "Married for 28 years! We have had our ups and downs, but to be honest, he was the 1 — I just didn't know it at the time. Sometimes 'the one' is an ideal based on youthful priorities, but with maturity, you realize some of those qualities aren't as important anymore... I might add also, that I ran into 'the ane' over again a few years back. Was not impressed, and I think I made a proficient escape there!"

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8. "20 years of wedlock and three kids afterwards, we are very good partners and make a great team. Even so, I am somewhat sad about how fiddling we have in common outside of that."

—gurlybrans

9. "It has gotten better with piece of work. He's a good man and I love him, merely I never vicious in dear with him. At the time we met I didn't want or need that. I needed safety and stability. Now that we've settled into life together, I've embraced those traits he brings, and when I go the urge for something more exciting, I find it in other means."

—HaneTheHornist

10. "It's going. I know it'due south not correct, but he is a good person. Sometimes I want so much more. Right at present, it would price me so much to go out, and I do have love for him. Our children have a smashing support organisation betwixt u.s., and nosotros live a decent life."

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11. "I didn't know he wasn't right until our first argument later getting married. I was convinced at that point that we would get divorced 1 24-hour interval. I'm still pretty certain information technology will happen somewhen. We have been married for seven years and have three kids. We keep our finances separate. I have protected myself in instance of a divorce. We are swell friends and he is a good dad."

—farmher21

13. "I love my meaning other and I know he loves me simply we clash and see life in two different ways. He is more downwards to world and keeps to himself while I am more probable to be caught in a spontaneous adventure. We do get well together and coexist well. Sex is far and far betwixt simply I have adapted to that. We practise testify each other random appreciation, and obviously celebrate birthdays and milestones together. Sometimes we seem more similar roommates than lovers — merely it isn't a bad thing. Beingness friends with your significant other instead of romantic isn't the worst thing on the world, is it?

—idk_about_this_J

14. "My partner and I are doing alright. We communicate well enough and we back up each other well. Is he 'the 1'? I don't retrieve and then. I don't experience a passionate love betwixt us and I'm not super sexually attracted to him (even though he is conventionally practiced looking). We have been together for 4 years on and off. We alive together. But if he asked me to ally him, I would say no. That's usually a good mode to decide whether you're 'meant to be.'"

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15. "Pretty good. It wasn't actually a honeymoon at the start but we have now been together for five years and are very happy."

—Snoo_85580

16. "It's only going well considering I'm no longer alone, but goddamn I actually fabricated a sacrifice..."

—Angelictitties

17. "I chose my hubby because he meets a lot of my needs, and I beloved him for that and for who he is. He's not a GQ model, he'due south non rich, and aye, sometimes he bugs the crap out of me. But I chose him. And I chose to love him for who he is rather than hold out for the idea of 'the 1.'"

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And finally...

18. "Volition be 6 years together in a few months. He is the kindest person I know and he has always treated me with zero just respect. He is the definition of a expert human. And — I tin't explain how I know this — just from the depths of my heart I just know that he volition never, ever hurt me. And safe is what I need to feel."

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You can read the full thread of responses on Reddit.

Notation: Some responses accept been edited for length and/or clarity.

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Source: https://www.buzzfeed.com/stephenlaconte/settling-for-partner-who-isnt-the-one-reddit

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